Friday, November 07, 2008

SOME JOKES ETC.

Sher Agrawal

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Marriage -- Part Two...

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Joke-of-the-Day Fri, Nov 7, 2008 at 4:43 AM
To: SHER







"The place where optimism most flourishes is the lunatic asylum."
- Havelock Ellis




Dog Of The Week


Rex Barker here with Friday's QUOTES THAT MAKE YOU THINK. This week we focus on Veterans as next week we'll see Veteran’s Day...

Please submit your favorite inspirational stories, pictures, quotes, or dog pictures to
RexBarker@Joke-Of-The-Day.com

We are not retreating — we are advancing in another direction.
— General Douglas MacArthur (1880-1964)

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.
- John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Valor is stability, not of legs and arms, but of courage and the soul.
- Michel de Montaigne

In war, there are no unwounded soldiers.
- José Narosky

This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave.
- Elmer Davis

Freedom is never free.
- Anonymous

I think there is one higher office than president and I would call that patriot.
- Gary Hart

I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask, "Mother, what was war?"
- Eve Merriam

Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few.
- Winston Churchill

Courage is fear holding on a minute longer.
- General George S. Patton, U.S. Army

I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
- Albert Einstein

We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
- Will Rogers

We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude.
- Cynthia Ozick Quotes

But the freedom that they fought for, and the country grand they wrought for, Is their monument to-day, and for aye.
- Thomas Dunn English

How important it is for us to recognize and celebrate our heroes and she-roes!
- Maya Angelou

This is Rex Barker hoping you all have a great and joyous weekend.

Please KEEP SENDING us your lessons and type 'LESSON' in the subject line. Your last name will not be used unless you give us permission in your email. We get hundreds, but all are read!

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Marriage -- Part Two...

16) There was a man who said, "I never knew what happiness was until I got married.... and then it was too late!"

17) Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.

18) They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense.

19) When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.

20) There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through HELL.

21) Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. (Irwin Corey)

22) When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at. (Epperson's law)

23) Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting. (Ray Bandy)

24) The more I know about men, the more I like dogs. (Gloria Allred, feminist attorney, 1995)

25) If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created. (Anonymous)

26) If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry. (Chekhov)

27) Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. (Woody Allen)

28) Once a boy becomes a man, he's a man all his life. But a woman is only sexy until she becomes your wife. (Al Bundy)

29) If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. ( Johnny Carson)

30) Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back. (Al Bundy)

31) An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested he is in her. (Agatha Christie)

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