MURDER OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE, Indian way

Infosys, Bangalore: An employee applied for leave as
follows:


"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land
along with my wife, please sanction me one-week
leave."
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· This is from Oracle Bangalore: >From an employee who
was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year
old son:


"as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for
two days.."

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· Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee
who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's
leave.."

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· From H.A.L . Administration Dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one
responsible for it,please grant me 10 days leave."


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· Another employee applied for half day leave as
follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10
o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day
casual leave"

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· An incident of a leave letter:
"I am suffering from fever, please declare one-day
holiday."

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· A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from
headache. I request you to leave me today"

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· Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for
the day."

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· Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her
only husband at home I may be granted leave".


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· Letter writing:-
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same
well."

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· A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for
a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I
am both(!! )for the past several years and I can
handle both with good experience, I am applying for
the post